eLove

A place to talk about serious "real life" stuff without having to place it in between a demand by Blankie for food and Logue's latest almost-pr0n thread.
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Oxygen
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Re: eLove

Post by Oxygen » Mon Sep 01, 2008 9:14 pm

Vchip wrote:Not to be rude my friend, but I dont think you should go as far and say "broken heart". Sure it would suck if she did not return your feelings, but your 18! Go out and experience people!
I'll suffer a tad then I'll be fine.
Vchip wrote:Recently I was talking to my friend about realationships. We were discussing the things that drive "love", and we both decided on intamcey is a BIG part of it. Sure you can be sweet,funny,ect. But your never going to be able to move the relationship along (if that's what you want to do of course) to a higher level.

Sometimes it takes a hug or kiss or maybe something more to truly see if you can seriously connect.
That's my main concern, really. Or was, rather. I'm certain we'd connect, but it's impossible to know.
Vchip wrote:Besides that, I still wish you the best of luck.
Thanks... thanks.

-

This whole thing, it's so depressing. I think I'm going to terminate it tomorrow, to be fully honest. It doesn't have anything to do with perseverence or patience anymore. I'm just dealing with my stupidity here.

Wait, terminate what, again? It's not even mutual love. Hell, I even think that she's starting to dislike me, the two last days have been hell for me. God damn christ. Here's a good start on my project concerning devouring emotions: I feel like vomiting.

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Zieg
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Re: eLove

Post by Zieg » Tue Sep 02, 2008 2:08 pm

Don't terminate anything. If she starts drifting away, talk to her about it. If it's really how she wants it to end up, then tell her you wouldn't want that, but you are open to whatever she wants. If she just wants to cut out a bit of your communication, then just let her know: You don't want to lose her as a friend. You don't know how much just something like that helps to let someone know they mean something to you.
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Oxygen
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Re: eLove

Post by Oxygen » Tue Sep 02, 2008 5:21 pm

Zieg wrote:Don't terminate anything.
The problem here is, I'm stuck in a one sided love. I'm certain that she appreciates me as a friend, but, as a lover, I highly doubt. And that's hurting me, which is why I'm willing to cut that stuff. We'll remain friends, and that's just as good.
Zieg wrote:If she just wants to cut out a bit of your communication, then just let her know: You don't want to lose her as a friend. You don't know how much just something like that helps to let someone know they mean something to you.
Yeah, I was going to let her know that

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Rising_Dusk
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Re: eLove

Post by Rising_Dusk » Tue Sep 02, 2008 5:37 pm

Just chill out about it. Don't be "stuck" in a one-sided love, heck, to say you love her at this point is nigh-on ignorant. I would say that by the very definition of love, you cannot be this far apart as it prevents interaction on a fundamental level. Take it from me, I've got firsthand experience. If you two ever happen to meet up, maybe you'll go to college around her, maybe when you graduate you'll get a job near her, who knows? If things get closer in distance, suddenly things may change. I think love without a motivation to get closer together distance-wise is senseless, even those internet dating things try to get people together, which is where their success originates.

Just stay a friend of hers and be happy that she likes you enough to talk to you. Don't expect more, don't try to make it more, don't give up that there won't ever be more, just know that one day it could be more. That shred of hope should be all you need if you truly feel as you say you do.
"I'll come to Florida one day and make you look like a damn princess." ~Hep

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Oxygen
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Re: eLove

Post by Oxygen » Tue Sep 02, 2008 7:01 pm

Yeah. I'm starting to understand the twist now, somewhat.

Jess appreciated me partly because I wasn't constantly annoying / hitting on her. I know she hangs with guys alot, and affection must not be lacking at all. And those last few days, I've been really clumpsy about it. I bet it turned her off. I bet the last thing she wants is affection, right now. And I tried doing just that. That would explain the last 3-4 days mood.

As a parallel to this, she joined the res, made a handful of friend extremely quickly, got very social. It's obvious that I'm going to get less attention.

Equally, I think that I may personally have gone a little too paranoïd... paranoïd about nothing, though. That's the thing.

Subsequently, I believe that a mix of these three factors made me go boarderline insane about this all.

No matter what though, I truely like her. I'll let her know that. I want to be friend with her forever, and if things went positively towards love, then so be it. But otherwise, I'll still be fine. I got over this, now. We went through alot together ( much, MUCH more than what I wrote at first, that's the tip of the iceberg if anything ) and I really believe that we have a strong base together. <3

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TheDeathstalker
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Re: eLove

Post by TheDeathstalker » Sat Sep 06, 2008 8:09 am

I think I missed the boat with this thread, but I've got a mildly related experience, and figure it can't hurt to share.

First of all, as a person who is left with nothing but Skype to keep a relationship alive, it can work. Let me qualify that though, as I had been dating Christie for a year and a half by the time she left for France (7 months across the ocean, about halfway through now). But as a whole, relationships are fine via webcam. Yeah you can't hold eachother or whatever, but I've no worries about the state of the relationship as it is now. Ok, this situation is different, as you havn't met physically, but at 17 and 18, you're looking at college soon, so that's something that could easily work out if planned for. For now, I'd recommend building the friendship and going as is, then see about getting closer.

Story time: I come from a relatively small town, so much so that I don't think we ever drove down the street without waving to someone. Because of this, I ended up in the same class with the same people year after year (the nearby military base offset this somewhat, but it's unimportant). Now, there was one girl who I've been friends with since first grade and who has, up until college hit, always lived down the street from me. Now, I'm not sure when I started to like her, but I finally realized that I did in middle school, and effectively shot myself in the foot. Repeatedly. We'd still see eachother in classes and stuff, but I kinda epic failed and played the game of trying to not let her know I liked her while still being around, so it just kinda flopped.

Fast forward to Junior year of high school on a 21 day class trip to Europe (well, kinda, it was with the class, just not sponsored by it... it's unimportant, whatever). But on this trip, we finally reconnected (and she made mention of how we were good friends and how i just dropped off the radar in middle school for some reason) and things were good, we were finally friends again. So, throughout Senior year, we'd hang out a fair bit, but she was always the type of girl who would change from month to month who she was wanting to date and all that, so I stayed firmly on the friend side of things. Well, during the 2nd half of senior year is when things got interesting. You see, one of my friends started liking her too, and through some forum were arguing over things as idiots like us do. Well, big suprise, and she finds the forum (well, actually it was a myspace group, yeah, eww, that she was invited to, which was actually the debate we were having, as to if we could really let someone liked by two people of the group into such a tight group of friends (it actually made alot more and alot less sense than that, but that's the gist)) and reads the threads we had, at which point she makes one post and leaves for good. The post (while longer than this) essentialy said "You're both nice, but... no... bye". I then sent her a message saying sorry, admitting i liked her, etc.. Well, come the next school day (oh, fun part of this, we were on the swim team, and since we lived so close, we'd drive together for about 40 minutes to the pool every day) everything's fine. I mean, a little aukward, but overall, everything was great. It was kinda wierd, it was as if at that moment i realized that being friends with her was perfect.

I've since gotten a girlfriend who I never met before getting to college, and kept being good friends with the girl from high school (actually, she's part of the reason i went to UF, not because a "hurr, i get to be near her" thing, but more of a "oh, you know, UF does look pretty good, and I'll have friends there"), even rooming with her over the summer.

So, overall, you never know. If you like her, you like her, there's not a damn thing you can do about it other than remove your internet or jump off a building. The difference between things going well or not from here on out is a mix between dumb luck, attitude, and balls. You've got to be willing to take what comes, no matter what it is, and make the best of it, because you never know how many dolphins are out there til you find them. Another thing that's important is to remember that if this doesn't work out, the next girl you'll love may very well not be anything like Jessica, and for some reason unbeknown to us, that's good. Not to mention the fact that I've got a growing repertoire of stories of people who let the "girl of their dreams" get away and are miserable because they've decided they've missed the best girl they'll ever meet (to be fair, this kid had a shitton of other issues that just compounded the problem, but it happens).

Best of luck with however this turns out dood.
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All broken and beaten and scarred,
Just have one more try—it’s dead easy to die,
It’s the keeping-on-living that’s hard.

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Oxygen
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Re: eLove

Post by Oxygen » Sat Sep 06, 2008 10:17 am

TheDeathstalker wrote:So, overall, you never know. If you like her, you like her, there's not a damn thing you can do about it other than remove your internet or jump off a building. The difference between things going well or not from here on out is a mix between dumb luck, attitude, and balls.
So damn true. Good post overall, I'm glad someone shares a somewhat-similar story.

The problem that I have "if you can call it a problem" is that we don't share the same level of appreciation towards eachother. Footshots as you said.

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Re: eLove

Post by Hydrolisk » Sun Sep 07, 2008 11:15 pm

I'm sorry, but right now I'm feeling really conflicted right now.

...

Mostly because of that picture of you. (I think my abdomen is going to explode.)

-

I'll post once I regain some seriousness. Or maybe not.

*Explosion.*
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Oxygen
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Re: eLove

Post by Oxygen » Fri Oct 17, 2008 6:43 pm

*shrugging*
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*laughing
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Konnar
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Re: eLove

Post by Konnar » Fri Oct 17, 2008 7:31 pm

Haha I haven't read the whole thread, only the first page or so but I really think you need to get a life.

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Oxygen
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Re: eLove

Post by Oxygen » Fri Oct 17, 2008 7:56 pm

Konnar wrote:Haha I haven't read the whole thread, only the first page or so but I really think you need to get a life.
You'll need to learn respect if you wish to even last a week here, and you'll need to know with whom you're dealing with. I'll give your ignorant shitface a chance, since you didn't really know what you were getting into.

For the time being though, blow me, and twink you. Also, remain careful.

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Re: eLove

Post by SetaSoujirou » Fri Oct 17, 2008 8:18 pm

Konnar wrote:Haha I haven't read the whole thread, only the first page or so but I really think you need to get a life.
Get a life says the one reading a forum! Particularly the Literary Arts section.
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Re: eLove

Post by Konnar » Fri Oct 17, 2008 8:28 pm

Serious poster is about serious business. I honestly don't give a crap if I'm banned. I'm sorry if I've offended you, I was just speaking bluntly (which seems to be accepted around here), and what I meant was that if something as trivial as this [relation over the internet] can have such a profound impact on you you need to diversify your activities and find more things to which you can hold on to, because you seem awfully emotionnally fragile (like most people anyways). I specifically had in mind
I knew what it was, deep inside, but couldn't really admit, or accept. But she was trying to leave WoW, and she couldn't do it if she still spoke with them people from the game.

Obviously that I was sad, but whatever made Jess happy made me happy. And I respected her choice. Everyday I'd see her log on aim, and I'd avoid talking to her.

The following months were rather dark for me. My marks were shitty, and I had played more than I ever did before. So much that I ended up being one of the top players on my realm. 16 hours a day were nothing, my parents were desperated, and I was depressed.
That just makes me sad. I doubt if you had your next (insert sports/arts/night out/friend/smokin' fat blunts/random fun) session to think about, you wouldn't react like that.

Again, I didn't mean to offend you, what I said just resumed my opinion perfectly.

SetaSoujirou wrote:
Konnar wrote:Haha I haven't read the whole thread, only the first page or so but I really think you need to get a life.
Get a life says the one reading a forum! Particularly the Literary Arts section.
What the hell ? I like browsing forums because I have jack shit to do on this friday night, besides you've just implied everyone frequeting this forum had no life. OH NO ! :o

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SetaSoujirou
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Mod Halp

Post by SetaSoujirou » Fri Oct 17, 2008 8:39 pm

Haha. Silly troll feeds on flaming! :lol:
A thread about love, turned so bitter.
I believe a mod should purge this thread.
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Re: eLove

Post by Konnar » Fri Oct 17, 2008 8:53 pm

Yes I am a troll, you can see it clearly when I'm going through the effort of explaining myself in such a way. And you're asking for a purge because I just said how much full of nonsense your post was.

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