Goodnight

[ReDSeX]

I can't sleep. I can never sleep. Down into the wee hours of the morning I always find myself watching the same infomercials, the cacophony of round-about drumming inside of my head, refusing me any rest. Sometimes I'd lay down in my bed and wait for Sleep to slowly come and crawl into bed with me. Other nights I'd stare at the mirror across at the other side of my room and I'd make faces at myself. Just to pass the time, you know?

Now, it was an odd thing. I'd gone 4 nights without rest and I was laying in my bed. It was another doomed attempt. But I came close! The folds beneath my eyes practically began to drag my whole face down. I was so excited, Sleep was to be mine at last! But o-how she eluded me... For as soon as the evil glare of the Sun struck at me through my window, Sleep was gone before I could pull her to my face. I could only wait for this coming night.

This was to be the moment of truth. As soon as the Sun fell back into the evening shades and only the shimmer of the Moon waned outside of my window, I slipped back inside of my bed. I was absolutely ready. I wanted her so badly to come. But she never showed up. It'd been hours and I hadn't moved. I was awake. Sadly, I was still so very awake...
"How are you?" I said to myself across the room.
"How are you?" My reflection replied.
"Tired." We said in unison.
"Then why don't you Sleep?"
And then I felt my head lay gently on my pillow.

I awoke next morning amazed. Finally, I had a solutions to my problems. This could finally be a surefire way to lull myself back into the graces of Sleep.

It continued onwards every night afterward. Anytime I wanted to fall into the bosom of Sleep herself, all I had to do was simply talk into the mirror across from me. Eventually, I moved the mirror right next to me at my bed side. Asking myself how I was doing became redundant after a while, so I tried to spice things up just to entertain myself. It started off with talking about normal everyday stuff. The same stuff you'd tell somebody you see on the street. How my brothers and sisters were doing. How the work place was. The weather. Normal stuff. But after some time, I found myself talking about my personal likes. Red wine tastes delicious. I admire black hair. One of my turn-ons was how soft a woman's skin can be. It continued after some time. It was the best Sleep of my life.

I found myself rushing to sleep almost every night. I couldn't get enough. I'd lay there on my side against my mirror and speak softly. So softly, passionately. I felt happy just to be alone with Sleep.
"The Daisies in...." I found myself saying one night. But I could feel myself slowly edging into Sleep. My eyes blurred. I could see her dark, mangled hair through the faintest outline against the mirror. Her lips were peeling, moving across from me, saying something. But I couldn't see. It was all Sleep now. Bloodshot eyes stared across from me. The folds beneath her eye lids quite literally made her whole face sag down. I could see her lifting 2 bony arms up towards me. The higher they went, the more skin drooped down to her elbow. She was whispering something to me, but she wasn't audible. I could only see her lips. Her eyes closed, and then I understood. She was reaching out to me. She wasn't saying something, she wanted to kiss me. Hold me.
O' beautiful beautiful Sleep...

I could feel the sunlight hitting my cheek. It was time to wake up. But Sleep was still there, still rasping and writhing her claw like hands out to me. Her eyes were open now and I could only watch as that poor wretched creature tried to pull me towards ever lasting rest. My eyes blurred. I could see my own silhouette against the mirror. A long, jagged inhuman scratch stretched across the width of the surface. The sun felt cold as it hit the side of my cheek.
Now I can't Sleep. I can never Sleep again.
Any comments will be well appreciated.

[TheIrishPatriot]

Hmm. There were little bits that were like "Oh, change that word", but I liked reading it . I was intrigued, and I wanted to know what happened. I dunno about the ending...just...*shrugs*. If you're going for that sort of "I got served" sort of thing...maybe have some more UMPH? I'd change it up..I just don't know how. Other people can probably get more technical and help better

[ReDSeX]

Naw dude, don't worry about it. You're response has been pretty everything everyone else has said about the story so far. They liked it, but the ending was confusing and felt rushed. I'm going to opt to change it soon. I'll bust something amazing.

[ReDSeX]

fixed the ending!